Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Decisions, Decisions......

So I'am sure mostly everyone has heard by now that we are in the process of moving back to Las Vegas. Nate accepted a position at Summerlin Hospital and we are scheduled to make the big move in the third week of April. I know some of you are shocked, elated, sad, curious, worried, the list goes on. Well I'am right there with you. With the move a little more than 5 days away, notices put into to Nate's current employer, schools and our landlord, it still has not hit me yet that we are moving back, it's almost like I can't fathom or process it for some reason.

Some of you are probably curious as to how/why we came to this decision to head back. Nate and I LOVE Iowa, like REALLY LOVE Iowa. I could and would gladly and happily stay here for the rest of my life and be completely content. Iowa is a serious hidden gem in this awesome country known as the USA. I will definitely be dedicating an ENTIRE future post on the magnificence of Iowa and all this so-called "corn" state has to offer. Nate and I have been struggling financially and spiritually for the last several years. We are doing fine now with Nate's income and position at his current hospital, but the hours and days that he works just plain suck! We haven't been an active going church family for years and it has been very difficult for us. We really need to get our family back on the path of salvation, but with Nate's current position we just don't see how that will ever be possible. I just can't take 3 kiddos to church by myself yet until Chase and Caitlyn are a bit older and can be trusted to handle themselves better. I have been offered help with Coby and the kids multiple times, but it's just difficult to even handle Coby by himself at church, especially since he is nearly my height and weight already. I'm getting off topic here so lets move on. Missing church and never having the chance at a normal schedule or even the possibility of owning a home one day again were huge factors in the final decision to move.

We feel this move will be very beneficial to us and are so excited to get to Vegas and get started. There are soooooo many things to do in Vegas for kids, for families, for every walk of life. Vegas has its down sides sure, with its CRAZAY-a$$ traffic/drivers, congestion in general, crime rates (mostly in the crazy parts of town), but it has its up sides as well. For one, my family (which I have not been able to share a single holiday with since we moved to Iowa in May of 2006), most of our friends live in Vegas or the surrounding areas and St.George, UT. (which is a piddly 2 hr. drive away), THE MOUNTAINS!!!, lots of fantastic restaurants, shopping, great church members (betcha didn't know Vegas has a LOT of LDS members), best of all a TEMPLE!!

The list of pro's we formulated in making our decisions to move, far out weighed the cons. We are anxious to get there already and get our lives back on track and to relax finally. Life in Iowa has been good, but it has been the most trying and difficult seven years of our entire lives. I'am grateful for the trials that Nate and I had to go through as a couple and as a family. We both have stated that while we were born and raised in Nevada, we really grew up and grew together in Iowa. We had no one, but each other to lean a lot of the time. Coming to Iowa really made us into the strong couple we are today. I have never felt more connected or more in-love with Nate. He is truly my better-half and my best friend. I thank Iowa for helping us become the strong couple/family we are today.

ok let me end this with a few pictures of our soon-to-be stomping grounds.


The Beautiful Las Vegas Temple:

Gorgeous Mount Charleston:


 Beautiful Red Rock Canyon:

Of course the Las Vegas Strip, because even it has its own beauty:

And the best part of all our new Home and Community:

One of Several pools: this is the lagoon pool with the club house in the background 

The Waterpark for kids right in our community

The Guard Gate, so you CAN'T solicit me :)

 The GORGEOUS golf course. Nate and I can't wait to get on it and play a round or several

 another of the course with the stunning mountain views right in our back yard

We also have several playgrounds for the kids and parks, more pools, (including a lap pool and hot tubs), tennis courts, racquet ball courts, a restaurant, a HUGE gym with b-ball courts and full fitness center (with access to every class imaginable, machines and such), ALL exclusive to those who live in this community and everything for FREE (with the exception of paying for rounds of golf and fitness classes (i believe). WE are ALL EXCITED!!!!  
We shall see you soon Las Vegas, house and FAMILY!!!!!



Monday, December 3, 2012

Recipes requested

ok so I have been asked alot lately to share some of the recipes that I talk about on Facebook and I was going to message everyone who asked me for them, but then I decided that would take me forever, so instead I will post about them here and then you all can print them and have them forever :)...although my kiddos will eat almost everything I make, most of these are the kids favorite's. These recipes are sooooo super simple and yummy

First up:

Garlic Chicken Pasta with Broccoli adapted from Cook's Country and Mel's Kitchen Cafe

6 garlic cloves, minced

1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes (this doesn't add spiciness - just the right amount of flavor)

6 tablespoons olive oil

2-3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (about 1 pound) Salt and pepper to taste

1 pound penne pasta

2 cups cooked broccoli florets or steamed spinach

1/2 cup chopped fresh basil or 1 tablespoon dried (i always use dried, so much easier LOL)

6 tablespoons juice from 2-3 lemons

1 1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese 

Bring 4 quarts water to a boil in a large pot. Meanwhile, combine garlic, pepper flakes and oil in a small microwave-safe bowl and microwave until garlic is golden and fragrant, about 1 minute. Pat chicken dry with paper towels and cut into bite-size pieces. Season with salt and pepper. Transfer 1 tablespoon of the garlic/red pepper oil to a large skillet and heat over medium heat until oil is rippling. Add chicken and cook until well browned and cooked through. Transfer to a plate.  Add broccoli to the boiling water and cook until tender crisp, remove with a slotted spoon and set aside. Add pasta to boiling water and cook until tender but still slightly firm (al dente). Reserve 1/2 cup cooking water. Drain pasta and return to the pot. Stir in chicken, cooked broccoli (or spinach), basil, lemon juice, Parmesan, and remaining garlic mixture, adding reserved pasta water as needed. if needed season with salt and pepper. Serve immediately.

we usually have garlic bread to go with this recipe as well.

Beef Noodle Bowl adapted from a Kraft magazine recipe/website and found on one of my favorite blogs http://jodienoted.blogspot.com/search/label/good%20eats

1 lb linguine
2 cups broccoli florets
4-5 carrots, peeled and sliced
2 tsp vegetable oil
1-2 lb beef sirloin steak, *cut into thin strips
1/2 cup Kraft Zesty Italian dressing
1/2 cup teriyaki sauce
2 tsp ginger

Cook pasta in large saucepan as directed on package, adding vegetables to the boiling water for the last 2 minutes of cooking time.

Meanwhile, heat oil in large nonstick skillet or wok. Add meat; cook until just browned on all sides. Stir in dressing, teriyaki sauce, and ginger; cook 2 minutes or until sauce is thickened, stirring occasionally.

Drain pasta and vegetable mixture; place in large serving bowl. Add meat mixture; toss until well coated. Sprinkle with dry roasted peanuts, if desired, and serve.

*Sirloin steak will be much easier to slice if slightly frozen.


you could easily half this recipe for a smaller family. :) it makes tons of left-overs


Zuppa Toscana adapted from Cafe Zuppas website with my own twist (this is not a kid favorite, but I have had many requests for it)

2 Tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

1 large yellow onion, chopped

2 {32} ounce containers organic chicken broth (or homemade if you have on hand; also, Costco carries a
great organic chicken stock at a great price)

4 medium potatoes, peeled and diced into 1-inch cubes

4 cups kale, chopped, stems discarded

1 teaspoon sea salt

1/2 teaspoon fresh ground pepper

pinch of red pepper flakes

3/4 lb. mild Italian sausage links, casings removed (a local grocery store, Harmons, makes the best house-made sweet Italian sausage with hints of fennel, which compliment this soup nicely)

1/2 cup heavy cream

2 large cloves garlic (minced)

grated parmesan cheese

In a large pot, saute onion in olive oil over medium heat until onion becomes translucent–about 10 minutes. Add broth, potatoes, kale, sea salt, pepper, and pepper flakes then bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 15 minutes. Meanwhile, cook the sausage until browned in a pan over medium heat, breaking up with the back of a wooden spoon. Once cooked thoroughly, add the sausage, cream and garlic to the soup. Heat to desired temperature and serve with grated parmesan cheese.  on top. Enjoy!


Korean BBQ Beef (my own recipe adapted from my step-mom who is Korean and taught me how to make it, this is the kids favorite thing I make)

There are literally a ton of different ways to make it, but my step-mom who is Korean and is from Korea taught me to make it with beef short ribs, but since those can get super pricey so, i do it like this: oh and these are just guesstimates, because I never really use a recipe for it I just know what's in the marinade and when it tastes right lol
 

2lbs. Thin Top round steak cut into smaller portioned steaks and against the grain (of course) :)  

Meat mallet (for tenderizing the steaks)




About 1 C Soy sauce (you could use reduced sodium Soy Sauce)

About 1/4 C sesame seed oil (found in most Asian sections of grocery stores)

1Tbsp sesame seeds

3-4 Tbsp sugar

Half of a white onion cut into strips

1 bunch of green onion, cut off the greener part and slice length wise (you can discard the whiter parts and save them for a salad or something else)

1/4 tsp ground black pepper

4 Cloves of garlic minced

Gallon sized zip lock Baggie

Best way to cook is a charcoal grill, but any grill will do . Tenderize the meat with the mallet as you deem necessary. Add everything into the zip lock bag either over night or at least 6 hrs. Before grilling. Cook meat to the temp you like, discard the marinade. Soooo easy and sooooo dELISH, serves about 4-6 people. You Can pair with steamed rice, fried rice, a nice Asian salad, some noodles, or some edamame.... Enjoy! again these are just rough estimates. Next time I make this I will measure everything out :)



Chunky Cheese Soup adapted from my friend Laura (kids love this)
2 C chicken broth

2 C diced peeled red potatoes (i never peel mine for this soup)

½ C diced carrot

½ C chopped celery

¼ C chopped onion

1 ½ t salt

1/4 tsp pepper

2 cloves garlic (minced)

1 C cubed cooked bacon (or ham)

1/4 C butter

1/4 C flour

2 C milk

2 C grated cheddar cheese

In a pot combine first eight ingredients. Bring to boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer until vegetables are tender. Add ham. In a saucepan, melt the butter; stir in flour until smooth. Gradually add milk. Bring to a boil; cook and stir for 2 minutes or until thickened. Stir in cheese until melted; add to the soup. thats it ENJOY!


Rotini Casserole (my own easy peasy, kid friendly recipe)

1 lb. rotini pasta

1 jar Ragu Chunky Tomato, Garlic and Onion sauce (you could make your own marinara sauce which I have done before and LOVE to do, but if you're in a hurry and want an easy sauce this is the way to go)

1 8 oz. can tomato sauce

1Tbsp dehydrated chopped onion

1/4 tsp each onion and garlic powder

1/4 tsp. crushed parsley flakes

a couple dashes of salt and pepper

1 1/2 C. divided shredded Mozzarella cheese or Italian cheese mix (Hy-Vee has a great Italian cheese mix already grated)

Preheat oven to 400. Bring 4 quarts water to a boil, add the pasta and cook til just about done/tender-crisp. drain the pasta (you don't want to over cook the pasta or it will be mushy when it comes out of the oven)and put in a pre-greased 3 quart casserole dish/ large cake pan. add the Ragu sauce (or homemade marinara), tomato sauce, dehydrated onion, garlic and onion powder, parsley flakes, salt and pepper and 3/4C. shredded Cheese, stir to evenly coat the pasta and to meld the ingredients together. top with the rest of the 3/4C shredded cheese and cover with tin foil. cook in the oven for 15 min. or until it's all bubbly. Remove the tin foil and cook for another 5 min. until the cheese in completely melted. Enjoy. (my kids love this! and it's MEATLESS! and so cheap)

I think that's it, if there is another recipe you want that I have posted about just let me know. I have tons more :-)
 

Thursday, November 15, 2012

The Marijuana debate...

ok friends, I would like to have a little discussion about the election results for just a tic here. I know some are over the moon about the re-election of President Obama, while others are mourning the loss for Governor Romney. I'am neither over the moon or heart broken. I' am simply just rolling with the punches. Truth be told I voted for Romney. It came down to his question "are we better off now, than we were four years ago?" my answer "NO!" We are trillions in the deficit, our troops are still out there fighting a war, no longer in Iraq, but still in Afghanistan and yet we sit idly by while stuff is going down in Syria. Gas prices are through the dang roof, cost of living and taxes have gone up substantially for peeps like me in the "middle class", statistics showing that at least half of America is on some kind of public assistance and should I touch on unemployment or just let it speak for itself??...yeah didn't think so. Now I will say this I don't hate Obama and I don't think he is evil. I do thank him for helping me out with money to go to college, which is something that I disagreed with Romney on. However the thought of taxes going up for peeps like me who are already struggling to make ends meet SUCKS! I'am so thankful and so blessed that my husband has a great career, that is both secure and has the capacity to go up in pay scale, so I can't really complain about unemployment at all, accept that over half of my family was and is still effected by it. In any case I hope President Obama makes good on his promises and that America moves "FORWARD" over the next four years and I hope that he proves me wrong.

p.s. Obamacare scares the crap out of me, for many reasons I simply couldn't sum up in one blog, but instead would need its own post. I will touch a little on this subject by saying that I hope it helps people like my mother who lost her job after being with her company 20+ years and has health problems and who currently has no health insurance.

 *********WARNING: this part could offend a vast majority of my friends and if you feel this might affect you, I suggest you stop reading now. This is my blog and I don't want to offend or upset you, but I cannot silence how I feel*****************

Moving on I want to touch on something a little controversial coming from a Mormon such as myself. Colorado and Washington just legalized the recreational use of Marijuana and I joked about it in a post on  FB a little. Truth be told though I really don't have a problem with it and when we lived in Nevada and it was on the ballot in 2004 to legalize it, I voted "YES" for it. Before you rush to judge let me clarify the "WHY??" for a moment. Our federal government spends $5.5 - 8.5 BILLION dollars a year just on the crack down of Marijuana ALONE. Does anyone have any idea how much money that actually is??  that figure DOES NOT include the cost of the prison systems. Our prison system is sooooo overcrowded with inmates who have marijuana charges and sometimes it all because "jimmy bought a dime bag off of Joe, for the fourth time, so now Jimmy and Joe both go to prison for a year+." Personally I would rather see that money spent on the crack down of Meth and other hardcore prescription and non-prescription drugs that shred families and neighborhoods apart. Truth be told I say legalize Marijuana and tax the heck out of it!!! it could bring in revenues of about $2.4 billion dollars a year in just the regular "goods" tax, much like food and clothing. It will give our prisons room for repeated DUI offenders and other offenders as well. If we were to outlaw anything I would gladly trade alcohol for marijuana use. Alcohol is WAY more addictive and costs us hundreds of BILLIONS/yr. in damages, not to mention all the loved ones people have lost to either death or addiction of alcohol. Now I know what some might say? "do you know the effects marijuana does to the body??" why yes I do actually. I know the "long term" and "short term" effects. Like I said this part may offend some, including my husband (who already knows this about me, but may not want others to know), but I have to confess that I smoked marijuana in high school, during my rebel years. I make no apologizes for this, but I do feel shame for it. I did it and I learned from it. I have drank alcohol in high school as well and I can tell you this I was still coherent after the use of marijuana, but was not at all while drinking alcohol. I learned from those experiences and have no desire to ever consume either EVER again. When I quit using both (which wasn't all that often). I decided to join the Church and get my act together and have never looked back. I have those experiences to share with my children and how I will never want them to do either. I really would like it legalized especially for medicinal purposes. anywho I know I may have offended you who is reading this and you may look at me differently now, but that's o.k. I felt the need to clarify myself and I make no apologies for the mistakes I made nearly 12 years ago as an idiot teenager.

In conclusion here. My heart is liberal, while my brain is conservative. It is a constant inner battle I face daily. I'm registered as a non-partisan, because I simply want to vote. I also wrote this blog post just to simply clarify my feelings on things and not to sway anyone in to believing or thinking as I do. Also if marijuana did become legal for medicinal and/or recreational use, I would never consume it again. I fully believe in, practice, and appreciate the "word of wisdom" given to me by my Heavenly Father and repeated by our modern day prophets and in the scriptures. 

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Fun in the Iowa sun...

There are very few places in Wdm where we can take Coby now-a-days and after the Tuesday debacle at mc d's where I thought I was going to pummel some woman for spewing hate at my sweet boy, the list of places we can take him is dwindling down. So Nate and I were thinking up a list of places for Coby to go and Jester Park popped into both of our heads. Jester Park is an awesome state park here in Iowa that is surrounded by sprawling trees and foliage, it is gorgeous and they have the neatest set up just for the littles complete with a cute this swimming hole with a place to build dams and spout. This little place is quite possibly Cobys favorite place in all of Iowa and when there is nobody else there it is our own little piece of heaven. We stayed at Jester for about an hour until a bunch of families showed up and it was time to go.



Iowa is amazing!! There are soooo many things to do here as a family and a lot of the stuff is either *free* or pretty close to it. I love Iowa and I just can't say enough about it. The opportunities that we have been afforded here makes me feel more and more blessed everyday. My brother and his fiancé are coming in approximately 8 days (but who's counting lol!) and I can't wait to show them what this place is all about and we may even eat some corn. After all this is Iowa :)

ps I'm blogging from my iPhone for the first time and I have no idea how this will turn out.. Hopefully the pics aren't all over the place

Sunday, July 1, 2012

facing reality

Of course it has been forever since I have posted and I only usually post on big holidays or I rant and B***H about how hard my life is, but whatever it is therapeutic for me to just let it all out, like a virtual journal except the whole world can read it should they choose. moving on.....

Today was a hard day for me. Nothing big or major happened, I just had an epiphany that I have been waiting to hit me since Coby was first diagnosed with Austism 4 years ago.  When he was first diagnosed after a crazy long day of testing and exams I already had prepared myself, I knew my boy had Autism even before they said it, I just did enough research on the web and with talking with other parents to know the inevitable. So when they confirmed it as I have said before I was relieved to be able to have the diagnosis, the only question I had was "ok what do we do now?" well we already had Coby in speech and in a special ed pre-school, so the only thing they really recommended was a little more speech and occupational therapy to help with some of his behaviors. I remember saying to Nate "thats it, thats all they can do for our boy?!" we have been doing that with very slow progress. I remember the clinical psychologist and the speech therapist reassuring me that with all the therapies and behavior modifications that Coby would be just fine, he had a more mild form of Autism, but a serious speech deficiency, but that with all the speech therapy he should be able to probably start speaking in sentences by the time he is seven or eight. Coby turns eight in March and he still has a barely two year old vocabulary. His assisted technology device "talker" has helped some, but his communication skills are nowhere were we thought they would be at his current age. So it leads to me question," is this it?!" is this it for our boy? will he ever get better speech or behavior wise?

Summers are so difficult for Coby, he loses his very structured day to day schedule that he is afforded at school, to stay home for nearly 4 months with us and it just is very difficult to keep his day as structured as it is during the school year with two younger siblings. I try my hardest, meals are kept at the same time as always, same goes for bath and sleep schedules. I long for him to have year round schooling and I just think it is such a disservice to him and kiddos like him to not have year round schooling, because when he does begin school again, it takes nearly half the school year to get Coby back into the routine and to start making progress, then BAM schools out again and he regresses. It is a vicious, vicious cycle and truthfully I was so excited to move to Minneapolis (when we thought we were moving there), because they have schools for Autism and YEAR round schooling, but since we are staying in WDM now, I have to readjust my expectations (which is fine because I LOVE WDM and have ZERO desire to move).

So back to my reasoning for this post, today I had that epiphany that made me think "my boy has Autism and this is it for him and for us" daily struggles, daily scream sessions, daily destruction of people or possessions and daily outbursts. I feel some self loathing, because it never hit me before that my boy will probably never get to enjoy life the way other kids his age do. Things he used to love to do, he is starting to struggle with. The sand beaches which has LONG been his favorite place he has a hard time enjoying now, because of sensory overload he has a hard time with all the noises, the texture of the sand, he HATES and I mean HATES the wind and refuses to step outside in the wind. All he wants to do with the sand is eat it and I have tried many different things to help with that. Coby hates to where clothing, he prefers to stay in his pull-up or to be naked, I dont know if it is the texture of clothing or his compulsion to want to be naked or its just how he is most comfortable, but it doesnt matter public place or not, he wants to be naked. We also took him to "Pump It Up" (bouncy house place) the other day and in the past he was able to wait in line (for a short period of time) for his turn down the slide and to jump in the houses, but this time, he was all over the place and very agitated and he pinched and scratched and slapped the crap out of me while we waited. He would push other kids down the slide or would want to cut people in line and would flip shiz if I tried to stop him, luckily the staff was so wonderful and caught onto Coby and made a game out of him waiting, to help him and I out.

I cant help the way I feel. I feel like Chase and Caitlyn are left out of so much, because of their big brother and I feel bad, because Coby gets so much attention and sometimes Chase and Caty are just off in the distance. They both are catching on now that Coby is a little different and sometimes they help out and sometimes they instigate and agitate Coby on purpose. We have hired a nanny (which is my sister) on Mondays and Tuesdays for 5 hrs. each day so that we can take Chase and Caitlyn to do things Coby can't, but we are still left with the guilt that Coby is missing out, but there are just certain places we just can't take the little buddy. You have to be one on one with Cobers and now that he is getting older and bigger sometimes its two on one. He is a strong kid, Coby is 4'6 and 61lbs. and since I'm 5'2 and 117 lbs. he is catching up to me quickly and thats where the epiphany comes in that someday he is going to be bigger and stronger than me and i'am terrified of what will happen if he pitches a fit somewhere and I can't just pick him up and carry him out or cant pry him off Chase or even myself. I may be worrying over nothing, but I can't help, but be a little worrisome for what the future holds. I have pad-locks with keys on all the doors in my home so that Coby wont get out and run off, what happens when he gets older and figures those things out?

I know I'am probably worrying myself over nothing, but if you have ever been in my home or are around Coby on a daily basis you would probably worry too. The amount of destruction that has been caused at the hands of our sweet boy totals in the 10's of thousands and no that is not an exaggeration. I pull my hair out on a daily basis from the stress and yes I may be a little dramatic and have self loathing, but this is coming from a mom with little sleep and utter mental exhaustion. I wish I could make people understand what it is like for my boy and our family on a daily basis, the struggles we go through, because of Coby's disability. I hate when people say "I know what your going through, because so and so did this or that" but truthfully you have no freaking clue and I cant fault anyone, because unless you live with him or someone like him or someone with Autism or a difficult disability or are constantly around that person, you cant possibly begin to understand. Your typical 2 year old throwing a tantrum, while yes it is difficult, I have a 2 year old who throws tantrums as well, that 2 year old will eventually grow out of it and there is an end in sight, but I have to see the end of tantrums with Coby.

I have begun a small novel here, but I just needed to let that out like word vomit. Do I feel better? you may ask...maybe a little....if you stuck around and read all of this, you are awesome! thanks....Until next time..there is so much more I could say and I just need to actually write a book...xoxo, Tiff      

Monday, March 5, 2012

Confessions/rants....

It has been forever since I have written an uplifting family post, but that is well on its way as soon as I can find my camera cord...we are all fine and dandy and healthy just want to put that out there, before I continue with this post, otherwise I'm sure to get a few worried calls :)....anywho a friend of mine did a post earlier titled "27 before 27 (confessions)" and it inspired me to keep it real and write and get things off my conscience...so here we go....confession/rants...

1. I'am completely stressed to the max lately and finally broke down tonight and had a good cry over dinner after Nate left for work.
2. Stressed from our financial state would be at the top of this list.. with one breadwinner in the family and on a nurses salary with 5 mouths to feed, house payments, car payments, insurance, etc., etc. (you get the gist) it is nearly impossible to save a dime.
3. I'am incredibly homesick for my family- Mother, step-dad, sisters, brother, grandmother, cousins, friends, I miss my Vegas family more and more everyday.
4. I miss my friend Robyn dearly and as I type her name the tears are flowing again...in times of happiness, stress, anxiety, frustration, sorrow, you name it and she was there...she is my best friend and I have never felt that friend connection with anyone like I have felt with my BF Robyn, I dont want to make any of my other dear friends upset, of course I love you all and have closeness with you, but with Robyn it was different we weren't just friends, she was more like the big sister I never had and always wished I did (I say big because she towered over my short self LOL)...maybe this is tugging at my heart strings more lately with the "favorite things party" just around the corner and the fact that yet another dear friend (Meg.) is moving in just a few short months either way, change is hard....anywho I just miss you my dear Robyn girlfriend....now if my other dear friend Carly were to move away, I think I might put a call into Mercy Franklin and ask them to reserve a spot for me for a 72hr. hold! HA LOL :) (mercy franklin is the psychiatric hospital here).
5. I wish I could find the spare change somewhere in the cushions that was big enough to take my family on a much needed vacation.
6. I sometimes fantasize about the days when it was just Nate and I, before all the stress that goes along with having kiddos...I wished we'd had more one on one time together before we had kids and wished we would have taken more advantage of it and traveled and stuff, I dont regret our kiddos, but you get what I mean, there is just nothing like those kid-free, newlywed years.
7. while fantasizing about the kid free years, I would love to just settle for a kid-free vaca. for just the two of us, I can just see us on a beach somewhere, sipping mockaritas, carefree with our feet in the sand or better yet locked in our private hotel room for an entire day having adult time (if you catch my drift ;) ) .
8. I scream and yell way too much...its ridiculous how much I yell at my kiddos, I'm trying to be better to take it day by day and some days are better than others, but still much room for improvement.
9. Both Chase and Caitlyn are pretty much potty trained now, but they still occasionally have accidents (almost always #2 UGH!) and today was such the day and you can refer to #8 for what my reaction was...I digress there is always tomorrow to try better on all our parts.
10. my house looks like a bomb went off in it right now and not because the kids have been overly dirty, but because I'am slacking and procrastinating...I love to clean, but some days I just get down in the dumps and then I get stuck in the weeds trying to catch back up..lets check the chore list shall we: bathrooms (disgusting), living rm./family rm.(dust mites much?!), floors (eeek!), laundry (yeah we just wont go there *sigh*).
11. I read the entire twilight saga series in exactly 7 days, each book was about 700 pages, thats the answer for number 10 HA!...conclusion: I dont read books, ask my mother...that was the first series I have ever read and it was AMAZING! loved every minute of it, LOVED THEM!
12. I need new glasses so bad, I cant see at night at all really and I cant even begin to tell how bad the headaches have gotten from it.
13. I recently cut my Father out of my life and at first I felt free, happy even, but now I'm starting to feel the remorse and the sorrow and before anyone rushes to judgement, this has been 20 years in the making and I wont go there as to what broke the camels back, but the harsh words that were exchanged between he and I would make the hair on the back of your neck stand tall and unless by an act of God and I mean no blasphemy by that statement I mean that quite literally, that relationship is long past repair..again don't judge I have fought for that relationship and apologized for no wrong doing for 20 solid years and I just don't have it in me anymore to fight, especially since its so one-sided...I do however regret the harsh words I spoke in my last conversation with said father.
14. along with my Father and the harsh words my youngest sister I also cut off to for the time being. she lived with us for a year and everything started off wonderfully, but then took a very ugly turn and she moved out and back to Vegas, very bitterly and said many untruthful things about Nate and I and we feel for the time being we just need a break and sometime to repair and heal from the year of sheer HELL....we sound so dis-functional, but I promise we didn't do anything wrong and I would be first to admit if we had. I'am not a perfect person nor will I ever pretend to be, but we really did nothing wrong.
15. I went to the OB back in January, because Nate and I thought that we would be ready again to finish adding to our family..went to the appt. and doc says everything looks great and that I should have no problems conceiving and that I should be ok with yet another c-section..I was relieved and excited, but now Nate and I want to wait yet another year, because we are both not ready financially, emotionally, physically or otherwise for another baby and I want nothing more than to be completely ready. When we do decide and I do get pregnant I want to be beyond thrilled and prepared, because it will be our final babe, but im just not ready yet.
16. Our lease is up on the house we currently live in at the end of sept. and we are trying to move to some really nice townhomes that were just built, but there is a big waiting list for them, because they are that nice and we are hoping to get into them, to save money, so that we can buy a house or build or whatever...I love the house that we currently live in so much and I will be super sad to leave and the thought of having to switch my kiddos school especially Coby overwhelms me emotionally.
17. I sometimes try to think of what life would be like for my Coby if he didn't have Autism, I know that probably sounds HORRIBLE, but when I see kids his age and see how they are and how my boy could be, it makes me sad...I have fully accepted my Boy for the sweet, special boy that he is, but I wish things were easier for him, things that come so natural for the rest of us like talking and interacting, he fights so hard for and as a mother it is disheartening and upsetting and maddening...I love my boy so much.
18. Coby will be 7 this month, the 21st to be exact and I wish we had the money to take him to an indoor waterpark and just make his day, but we are on a super tight budget and just cant afford to.
19. Nate and I, even with all the stress happening lately, have never been closer or more in tune with each others feelings, thoughts or opinions. I have never felt more in-love or happy in my marriage..we are closer than ever in every way possible and I feel that its because of the trials. I LOVE you more everyday Nate and I mean that with every fiber of my being...Thank you for being my VERY best friend.
20. I'm headed back to school this summer and I'm both nervous and excited. I want my degree so bad and im oober jealous of you if you have yours.
21. I wish we were a two car family, because sometimes being a one car family is challenging.
22. I miss my mom so much, I miss her laughter, her infectious sense of humor (we are so bad when were together LOL), and I miss seeing her with my kids, she is such an amazing grandmother and you can just see how much she loves my kiddos by the twinkle in her eyes whenever she looks or talks about them..
23. I have intense guilt for not being there for my mother-in-law more, especially since she has been so sick lately. She is always there for me whenever I need her and it is killing me that I haven't returned the favor, but sometimes I just dont know what I can do and feel as though I will get in the way..not making excuses just thinking out loud...I should take some meals to her and maybe that will help...if you are reading this Mommy-in-law I love you dearly and sorry I haven't been there more.
24. Nate applied for a student loan repayment program last month and we wont find out til sept. if we got it or not, but if we do they will pay off 85% of his student loans and I cant tell you how much that excites me...the amount of student debt. we are in is in a large amount, not quite as much as a doc. but definitely runner up...yeah its going to be a LONG 8 months :-/
25. Caitlyn is very Sassy! in fact sassy would be a scarce understatement, she is down right horrible at times and somedays I just want to smack her, I don't of course..timeouts seem to do the trick and help, but I have never met a 2 year old who can bring me to my knees and make me pull my hair out more than she can and has...on the flip side she is very independent and smart, she dresses herself and puts her own shoes on, brings me the boys clothes, shoes, jackets and backpacks and helps me to dress them in the morning and get them on the bus. She loves to clean, dance and sing and she is very nurturing and soft, but she is definitely boss and bosses the boys around much to their dismay. I love her to absolute pieces, but in my humble opinion girls are much harder to me than boys.
26. Chase, oh my sweet Chase, where do I begin with this boy, he is my rock, the glue that literally holds us all together. He is so smart and witty, kind and funny. he says and does the darndest things and he is just precious. He has a bad boy side to him as well and for a while there I wasnt sure either one of us would live through the potty training, but he never ceases to surprise me...he keeps asking me lately "mommy what time is it? is it 8'0'clock? is it bedtime yet?" and tells me constantly "mommy I love you!"...he is the sunshine in all my days.
27. Coby is always a fighter, he fights hard everyday to learn and talk and interact. he was having some difficulties with sleeping again, but now that is all better and he is sleeping better than ever and that is good for everyone, but especially for him. He is working especially hard on transitioning from one task to another and improving daily. it pains me that my baby, the one who made me a Mom, will be 7 in a matter of weeks and will be in 2nd grade this year and is only a year away from baptism, its hard to believe how fast he is growing, he is so perfect and special and we love that boy.
28. because I will be 28 this year and I'm struggling to come to grips with the fact that my 20's are flying out the window and the 30's are just around the corner eek!

well anywho that is all...hope you stuck around to read it...this is by no means a woe is me post, but more of a I need to clear my head and now I feel so much better...thanks to whomever stuck around to read the novel LOL! :)...until next time....

Sunday, June 19, 2011

a Great Daddy....

is a man who.....
has the BEST sense of humor!


loves his daddys girl


humors his wife with picture taking

has been married 7 good years


is my very best friend



loves taking his boys to the beach


can be cheesy just like me



loves teaching his children new things



gets excited about new toys just like his kids do



loves his princess




is a graduate


loves his family and old beater trucks


has a tender heart


loves his Chasers



works hard and is the BEST Nurse


is a fantastic brother-in-law LOL!


loves anything outdoors related




is a great brother and friend


loves baths!~ hahaha, he will kill me for this one


takes such pride in being a father



had surgery and massive kidney problems, yet returned to work and school 2 days after being discharged!


just loves his boys!



always excited to have another kid





is an avid camper!


loves Iowa and its four seasons and take pride in his massive snow men LOL!



loves his Cobers


loves the fourth of July!



has a very strong work ethic and feels it is of the up-most importance that he teach his children to have one as well


Happy Fathers day to the most amazing, wonderful, loving, funny Daddy we know!